My first blog post on my new crazy world of motherhood, I figured I may as well chuck myself in the deep end and chime in with my views on the subject that all new mums will have an opinion on, breastfeeding.
I'll start with a little disclaimer, I am firmly of the belief that all women absolutely have the right to choose how they feed their babies, this post is purely about my own choice and my thoughts on breastfeeding.
It was actually a debate on Loose Women (which along with Lorraine, is my new favourite show, surely I can't be the only new Mum out there who has actually seriously considered series linking it when I go back to work, I'm not sure how I can cope without Katie Price, JSP and co at lunchtime) that inspired me to write this post. The debate was around the pressure on mum's to breastfeed.
I honestly feel the only person who put pressure on me to breastfeed, was me. And I did put a massive amount of pressure on myself to do it because I firmly believe it was (and still is) the absolute best thing for my baby. I think the pressure I put on myself is the only reason I am still doing it now. Make no mistake, breastfeeding is really bloody hard in the early days and you have to be absolutely determined to do it after going through childbirth which in my experience, leaves you feeling like you've ran fanny first into a bus after pulling 3 consecutive all nighters.
Whenever I hear a mum to be say, "I'll try breastfeeding" or "I've got some formula in just in case I can't do it" I can guarantee after 3 days, those babies will be on the bottle - which is absolutely fine - I really think you have to be completely committed and convinced it's the best thing for your baby or it just won't happen.
Breastfeeding comes pretty easy to some women, I found it incredibly painful for a few weeks but I had a great support form my Aunty who really encouraged me and assured me it would get easier, and I can honestly say now, it really does. Now, it doesn't hurt at all and my baby is thriving, I am SO glad I stuck at it. There were some pretty dark moments when I was using my babies teething ring to bear down on while he was latching on, my nipples were cracked and bleeding, I cried, a lot. I ate even more, it's hungry work.
To get through it, I thought of women like our great grandmothers, or women in developing countries who would have more than likely had a much more traumatic experience of child birth with little or no pain relief, and nowhere near as much after care and no access to formula milk so no other option than to breastfeed.
I think if women feel under pressure to breastfeed and feel guilt tripped into it by midwives/health visitors/family, then we are doing something massively wrong. I really think more women should WANT to breastfeed, and know the benefits - and also be prepared because it is really bloody hard.
For me, it was a no brainer when I heard that everytime I kiss my baby, my body picks up on any germs he is carrying, and my breastmilk would be made with the right antibodies for him to fight off any potential infections - that to me is absolutely incredible!!! When I heard this I was absolutely committed to breastfeeding, there really was no other option for me.
Other benefits for me are not having to faff about sterilising equipment, waiting for boiled water to cool and pay out for formula. It's also massively convenient as I don't need to pack bottles for him when we are out. Plus as massive foodie, I'm interested to test out the theory that breastfed babies are less fussy eaters as they get lots of flavours from your diet in the breastmilk.
I hear a lot of mum's saying, "I wanted to breastfeed but my milk didn't come". I think this is such a shame, as no one's milk 'comes in' for the first 3-4 days, its completely normal, you just have to keep going. I think its a shame this isn't more common knowledge and so many women give up because they think they can't do it.
In the early days, a few people commented that my baby seemed to feed a lot (newborn babies tummies are the size of a marble, so yeah, they get hungry pretty quick). I was also repeatedly told he was 'using me as a dummy' and to give him a dummy. in the first few weeks, babies do suck a LOT without feeding, but this is natures way of telling your body to make more milk and ensures there is enough milk for them later. I did give him a dummy when he was 6 weeks old once I was happy he was getting enough milk and to build my confidence when out and about with him (got to love a baby plug to stop that screaming), and I am glad I waited. Also, a dummy is an artificial pacifier used to replace a nipple, not the other way around.
Breast fed babies also tend to wake up more in the night to be fed - this isn't always the case, I know breastfed babies who slept through from a few weeks old, but generally you will be up in the night more with a breastfed baby as they won't have had a massive load of formula. I think if I had been someone who needed 8 hours solid sleep a night, I wouldn't have coped, but ultimately, I'm on maternity leave, I'm up a few times in the night feeding my baby, but it's not like I've got to get up and make myself presentable and use my brain for anything more taxing then remembering to put ITV on at 12.30 for Loose Women.
I've heard women say they put their baby on formula so Dad could bond with the baby, there's so many other ways Dad's can bond with babies, they can do their bloody share of nappy changes for one! They can also have loads of lovely cuddles, play with them, bathe them….
So in response to the "pressure to breastfeed" debate, I think putting a bit of pressure on ourselves to do it if we have made an informed choice to WANT to do it is a really good thing for us as Mum's, and our babies, but if women feel under pressure from their care providers to do something they aren't sure they want to do, then I really think they should not be guilt tripped into it, breastfeeding will only work if it suits everyone involved and you WANT to do it.
"When I look at my baby, I feel so proud that I made him, I've fed him and he's grown and thats all down to me". It really is worth sticking at it through those painful first few weeks to be able to say those words.
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